By Joshua Liao
The human race is ready to welcome the next millennium. But as in every celebration, there are always people out to spoil the party.
"The next millennium doesn't start until the year 2001, you idiots!" The Smart Guy says. As the rest of the clueless humans pause in confusion, he continued, "When you count, you start from 1, not 0! So the millennium starts in 2001, not 2000!"
Thank you, Mr. Smart Guy, we already know that. But is your logic really bulletproof?
Think about this, all ye who have brains. How do we name the decades? We call them the 70's, 80's, 90's, etc. Now let me ask you, does the year 1990 belong to the 80's or the 90's? Do you see my point, Mr. Smart Guy? Sometimes, my friend, normal people do start counting from 0. And I don't see why we can't start the millennium at 2000.
I really think that the whole debate about this is plain silly. It sounds like a "What is the first day of the week... Sunday or Monday?" type of debate. People may not agree on the answer, but who cares?
Now, if you are the average idiot, you must be pretty confused. So when does the millennium start anyway? 2000 or 2001?
Let's answer the question scientifically and rationally. First, we must define "millennium." The dictionary defines it as "a period of a thousand years." If you think about it, a millennium can actually begin anytime. In other words, every moment is the beginning of a new millennium. In fact, I have decreed that my own millennium will start tomorrow, at exactly 9:15 AM. Anyone wants to call me an idiot for that?
Anyway, I am getting tired of this. See you next year, people, and remember to have fun at your millennium parties. And for those strange ones who insists on the doctrinal error of celebrating on 1/1/2000, well, suit yourself. Just don't forget to invite me to your parties on 1/1/2001.